Desire Ch. 78 - Daddy

[itztigress3]

Chapter 78 - Daddy
POV: Emily
Word Count: 5835

I quietly fixed dinner, not that it was a hard item to prepare and it gave me some time to think about what was happening.

My father would be here soon. A man I’d never met, I’d never seen, I’d never even known had existed. A man that was also my older two brother’s father and I wondered if I needed to call them but I wanted to tell them first so I elected not to. The closer it got the more nervous I got. I heard the doorbell and I heard Zac get the door, greeting someone. I was done so I cleaned my hands and dried them before I walked to the foyer where they stood; he was taking his jacket off and putting it on the coat rack.

He was tall with dark brown hair that was curly even short, broad shoulders and lean. He had on navy blue jeans, a white button up long-sleeve shirt, and a brown and white stripped sweater vest with black running shoes. When he turned toward the sound of my own shoes on the floor he smiled and I seen that he had the same color eyes I did, the same high cheekbones and soft nose. Everyone said I looked like my mother, but I clearly saw myself in him. But, the one thing was, I’d seen him before.

“Emily, this is Aaron Christopher Erikson or Ace, this is Emily.”

He smiled and I stood there a moment, I wasn’t sure what to say really.

“Jeremy didn’t lie; you do look like your mother. It’s been a very long time since I’ve seen you.”

“Four years, it hasn’t been that long. You were at my college graduation; you sat in the front row.”

“You knew I was there?”

I smiled some. “Hard not to notice when you screamed congratulations for me when no one else did. I didn’t know why or who you were.”

Zac didn’t seem to keen on that bit of information, but he had said he knew about some events.

“You were also at my high school graduation; you sat amongst people I knew though.”

“I couldn’t miss those events and I would have been at your wedding had I been able to find any information but given what I heard I don’t think I would have made it inside.”

“You wouldn’t have, security was pretty tight that day.” Zac said.

“Yeah, dinner is ready and I know they are starving as they’ve been stalking the kitchen for the last 30 minutes.”

“We have not!” Zac said.

“Then why is the candy dish half empty?”

“That was me actually.” Casey said.

Aaron, or Ace, looked to him confused and unsure.

“This is Casey, he lives with us. Casey this is Ace.” Zac said.

Casey shook his head and we lead him to the kitchen where it was fix your own plate and sit. It was different and not quite our normal chatter during dinner. Once everyone was finished he handed me a box, plain brown box. I had seen it but didn’t know it was for me. I carefully took the cover off and moved the tissue paper, inside was a book about butterflies.

“Open the cover.”

I glanced at him and then pulled the cover back and on the inside in the same very neat hand written it had a ‘this belongs to’ stamp and my mother’s name was written there.

“She loved butterflies and I bought her that book after she had Aaron, of course I wasn’t aware at the time I was his father. She couldn’t take it home for obvious reasons so she left it with me. I have a feeling that she’d much rather you have it now.”

“You didn’t have to get me anything.”

“I know that, but it’s something I’ve always wanted you to have.”

Casey laid his napkin down and looked at Zac and the two of them got up and got the dishes.

“I guess there cleaning up.”

“He’s not here to see us Ems; he’s here to see you. It wouldn’t be fair to make you cook and then clean.”

I giggled. “I wasn’t cleaning anyway.”

I got up and he did as well, we walked to the living room where he paused at the door.

“This is different, the kitchen and dining room have this clean lines and polished look while in here is more I’m not sure how to describe in here.”

“I designed the kitchen myself and left in here to Zac. He has some odd style that is unclassified and unknown.”

“I see.”

I sat down on the sofa and he sat down on the other end, leaving the middle seat empty. It got quite for a few minutes; he was just looking around at the pictures on the walls and shelves.

“I’ll assume that since you knew where to find me that you’ve known about me all this time? I mean you were at my graduations.”  I asked.

“I knew Bella was pregnant with you when she knew, which was about a month. She went in for a sonogram at five and when she came over she handed me pictures, clearly indicating she was having a girl. She told me that you weren’t David’s, that you were mine. I wasn’t sure I believed her really, but she then told me she was certain that the last three were mine.”

“Did she say why she believed that?”

He frowned some and looked at me. “She did, but I’m not sure you want to know why.”

I saw Zac poke his head around the corner and frown.

“There is nothing that I don’t want to know Ace. I don’t know anything about what went on before I was born. 26 years I believe that fucking bastard was my father, the least you can do is tell me what you know. You’re the only one that can because he killed my mother for having me.”

“He…what?”

“David killed my mother because she had me. Because she lied to him and told him I was a boy.”

It was clear he didn’t know about that and it took him several minutes to compose himself again.

“I was told she died as a complication of the birth itself, not that he’d done anything.”

“My oldest brother saw him hit her in the abdomen after I was born; she died of hemorrhages which were apparently caused by him hitting her. He blamed me of course.”

“It wasn’t your fault.”

“I know. So, how was she certain that we were yours?”

“She told me after the twins were born your fa...David developed a hernia in the groin region. She said that the doctor did surgery but they told her that they accidently cut the wrong area and cut the vas deferens, they basically gave him a vasectomy, and they couldn’t fix it. She said she told them she would tell him herself. She never did. Your mother wanted a lot of children, she said she did but when he started hitting the kids, she couldn’t handle it. She didn’t tell him and that meant when she got pregnant she couldn’t tell him they weren’t his.”

“David isn’t stupid, he would have found out about that.”

“According to her he did not know. I can’t verify that it was the truth either; she just assured me that Aaron and Christopher were my sons and that you were also mine. She wanted to give you to me but she couldn’t, she had an adoption lined up but David found out and stopped it.”

“He found diaries of hers, where she’d written it down, its how he found out.”

“Sounds like her, she loved to write as much as she read.”

“How did you see me at the hospital?”

“David took the boys home and she called, she said she wasn’t feeling well and that I deserved to see you. She had you brought back for a little while and the nurse took the picture. I actually passed David when he came back. A few hours later Jeremy called me and told me she died. Jeremy was a mutual friend of mine and David, he’s the one that told me about events and let me know how you were from time to time. He couldn’t provide pictures though.”

“How did you get the one of the three of us then?”

He smiled some. “Jeremy, he developed the pictures from the hospital because David claimed he couldn’t. He removed the one of me and you and gave me a copy of the three of you and also one of your mother and you. He couldn’t remove any others though.”

I saw Zac and Casey go up-stairs once the kitchen was clean, I guess they were seriously leaving me alone with this man but Zac came back down a few minutes later and literally flopped down in the chair. Ace looked over at him puzzled.

“Ignore me; I’m not here at all.”

“He is very protective, isn’t he?” Ace asked.

I smiled. “Yes, very much so, believe me; you don’t want to see him mad.”

Zac smiled at me and picked up a book from beside the chair, one he’d been reading for months and I was sure he wouldn’t read much of it.

“I haven’t decided if I like your husband or not.”

“I’ll tell you like I told my brothers, I really don’t care of you do or not. He’s done a lot for me and he’s been there the last four months when everything fell apart. I wouldn’t be here right now if he hadn’t been there.”

Zac just smiled at me and put his nose in the book.

“So, you’ve known about us our entire lives?” I asked.

“Well, I have known about the three of you since right before you were born. Until then I thought Aaron and Christopher belonged to David.”

Zac glance at me. “If you knew about us, how come you didn’t try to take us from him? A DNA test would have proved you had rights to us. You could have taken us from him.”

I saw his head drop some. “I was 23 when you were born and honestly I wasn’t ready for children and I was still in college at the time. I talked to a lawyer without giving much details and she pretty much told me there was no chance they would pull three kids and give them to me with no job and no home of my own. So, I did what I had to do. I finished school, found a great job and bought a house and then I sought a lawyer. You were three at the time and I told the man exactly what your mother told me. He filed for a paternity test but David flatly refused and he told the court he was your father and that he wasn’t giving any of you up. He wouldn’t do the DNA test; I had nothing proving my story. I couldn’t even prove that we’d been together.”

It didn’t take me or Zac long to do the math there.

“You were 23 when I was born?”

“Um, yes. You were my birthday present actually. You and I have the same birthday. I turned 23 the day you were born.”

“But that means you were like 16 when Mom had Aaron.”

“I was 16 when she had Aaron; I turned 17 a few months later.”

“How did you even meet her?”

“I was working at the supermarket she shopped at. I was in produce one day and she had the three oldest with her at the time, George and the twins Jason and Joshua. Jason was screaming bloody murder in the middle of the produce section and George wouldn’t stay at the buggy. I chased him down for her and brought him back. I then helped her for the rest of the trip because Jason just wouldn’t stop crying. She said he was very colic and cried a lot; I remember an old trick and recommended it to her. She came back the next week and thanked me, apparently it worked. We talked a bit and I always thought she was very young to have three kids.”

“So, you helped her catch George and cure colic and that lead to you sleeping together?”

He smiled some. “Actually yeah, it was May when I met her and we didn’t have sex until July. I was actually 15 when she met me and it was after my birthday the first time. She was my first and she told me in September she was pregnant again but that it was her husband’s baby. It was strange because some of my co-workers actually said Aaron looked like me.”

“You obviously kept seeing her after he was born, otherwise Christopher and myself wouldn’t exist. The police confirmed that we all have the same father.”

“I loved Bella, it didn’t matter that she had four kids at the time. I loved being with her and with them. We often had some dates when she had to bring them; it wasn’t all about sex with us. We spent a lot of the time just talking and being together. She hated David, the only reason she was staying was because of the kids. She was afraid he would take them from her if she left, truthfully he would have.”

“Did she talk about leaving him?”

He took a deep breath. “A few times, she mentioned it after Aaron was born about wanting to leave him, she didn’t tell me why but later on she did and it was because he had hit George. I knew he was hitting her and I tried to get her to just leave but she didn’t want to leave the boys with him. She did love him I could tell.”

“So, you continued to see her…”

“Yes. Christopher was born in 1979 and I was almost 19 at the time. I had graduated and was attending college nearby, I never left because of her. I couldn’t move away from her. Even thought I was sure she was never going to leave David. I begged her too when I graduated, I told her I’d take care of us any way I could. But, she wouldn’t. She said financially David was providing and I couldn’t match that at the time. She also didn’t want me to give up my dreams for them. Your mother was a selfless as it came; she didn’t care much about her own needs and wants but did about everyone else.”

“You should have made her.”

“I should have, yes. I didn’t know David and Jeremy was a good friend of your mom’s and the only man allowed around her apparently. He actually caught us one day after Christopher was here but understood.”

“If you knew our names, why didn’t you think Aaron and Christopher weren’t yours?”

“She told me David chose the names. I didn’t question it.”

“If she had lived would you have tried to get her to leave him?”

“Yes. That was my plan before she died, that I’d find a job that matches or outdid what he made and I’d prove to her that I wanted to be with her and that I’d raise you all as ours. I just wish I knew she was in danger like that because I would have called someone, done something.”

“He would have killed her anyway, he told me he was. That she knew he didn’t want girls.”

“Why not?”

Zac cleared his throat and Ace looked at him and so did I. “Let me guess, over protective husband told you not to ask questions on some subjects?”

“In fact, yes I did because as your husband I know what topics upset you.”

Ace looked back to me. “He’s entitled to ask too Zac, because if he is really my father then shouldn’t he deserve to know what David did exactly?”

Zac laid the book down in his lap; he hadn’t even turned a single page. “Yes, but it doesn’t mean you have to do that right now.”

“Don’t make me kick you out of the living room.”

He just smiled. “You can try; I’m not leaving the room.”

I tilted my head and smiled at him and he looked a little nervous then. I turned back to Ace though.

“The reason David did not want a daughter is because little girls turn him on, his preference range is double digits though. But, he told her he didn’t want girls, just boys.”

The blank stare said that Mom had never told him that and that was news to him all around, which could be good or bad. If he had known about David’s preference in little girls would he have tried harder to get us?

“Did he ever…he didn’t…I mean…” he stumbled over the words and Zac just looked at me.

“Not when I was that young, he took a bunch of pictures and jacked off to them apparently but he never actually touched me when I was little.”

“Is that why you left at 16?”

“No. I left because he told me I was going to marry a rapist and a murderer, I wasn’t marrying anyone at that time so I left and went to Craig. He was my best friend and his mom’s a lawyer. She got custody of me and I stayed with them for two years.”

“Adam? Is he the guy that was with him at the house when he was arrested?”

“Yes.”

He started fidgeting with the sweater and I was pretty sure what the question was he wanted to ask, the question was should he know? His story seemed to match so far, there wasn’t much I knew but Courtney had said Mom was with someone a lot but she didn’t know who. She said she was pretty sure he was younger than her and that he worked at one of a few places she visited, the supermarket was one of those places. I also remember George saying Jason had colic when he was a baby.

“David didn’t touch me when I was little because he thought I was his, he obviously never believed mom would have a child by someone else. He didn’t believe that until Adam kidnapped me in July. He ran a test while I was there after he told me what a whore my mother was and he got the results that Friday, DNA results that said that Aaron, Christopher, and I weren’t his.”

Zac actually got up and moved to be sitting on the arm of the sofa. I wasn’t sure if that was good or bad though.

“He wasn’t very happy about it and since mom wasn’t there he took it out on me. Couple of really hard abdomen hits and he raped me twice; he made Zac sit in a cage and watch. It was that Saturday when we managed to get out.”

“Did he ever hit you as a child? Jeremy kept telling me you were fine and that he wasn’t hurting you.”

“Jeremy lied to you; he hit me just as hard as he hit them. He knocked me out when I was 12; I screamed that I hadn’t killed Mom. He started hitting me for no reason when I was 14, which coincides with when he met Mom. A friend found out and he did lie off but he never stopped. I can’t exactly remember the first time he spanked me that hard, I was probably six or so.”

“Jeremy said he’d stopped hitting you all when she died, I don’t know why he would have lied to me. If he had told me the truth I would have kept trying to take you and even the others. I tried when you were three and again when you were five. Both times he flatly refused and without something they wouldn’t make him. I guess for your safety it was best he believed you were his too.”

“I guess.”

“I’ll assume he wasn’t at your wedding?”

“No. He was uninvited by Zac actually. We found some photos albums and they were pictures of me ones he’d been using as porn basically. I wouldn’t give them back and honestly he didn’t approve of Zac at all, he never did because to him I should have married Adam. Even after that son of a bitch raped me and put me in a hospital he thought I should forgive him.”

“Adam did that too?”

“Couple years ago, Zac was divorcing his first wife and her boyfriend was trying to scare me into admitting we were together. Adam joined but he was the one there. It was pretty bad then, but nothing like the last time.”

I felt Zac’s fingers on the back of my neck, letting me know he was there.

“I can’t image how that felt for you. I just…I’ve always known about where you were but I was terrified if I approached you and told you, that you’d be pissed off and you’d never believe me.”

“I can’t say I would have believed you. Honestly, I didn’t believe David’s test. I asked the police to run it through them and it took longer but I wanted confirmation from places I trusted like the FBI. They provided the results to me about a month ago, proof that he wasn’t my father. I didn’t ask about Christopher or Aaron until last week after our nephew was born and truthfully I wasn’t going to look for you until he was born.”

“Why not until then? Did you not want to know?”

“Holding him was both good and bad honestly, but as I was holding him, I thought about you. If you’d ever gotten the chance to see us, hold us, if you even knew we existed. I didn’t know if Mom had ever told you.”

“I’m sorry.” Ace said.

“Don’t be, it’s not your fault.” I said.

“I should have been there Emily, I should have kept trying and maybe eventually he would have given in.”

I shook my head no. “No, if you had kept trying to get us then he would have run the test himself much sooner. There is a chance that he would have given us to you, at least the three of us, but Ace I can guarantee that he would have done something to us before hand. He’d have probably raped me then and made sure I was truly traumatized before he handed me over. There’s no telling what he would have done to the other two. It was traumatizing enough to endure it now as an adult.”

He nodded and the room grew quiet for some time, letting him digest the information given as well as processing what he’d told me. Zac eventually went back to the chair but didn’t bother to fake reading, we knew he wasn’t.

“Did you have any more children after me? If so, do they know about us?”

“I did not have anymore; the three of you are the only ones I have.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. Um, my partners of choice since I was 25 can’t have kids.”

“What do you mean by that?” Even Zac looked confused.

“I’m gay Emily; I haven’t been a female since I was 25. After your mother died I had 1 partner and I was just trying to be normal. But, your mother was it for me; she was the only female in the world for me. It was a huge adjustment then and I haven’t really displayed it much.”

I giggled. “I don’t have a problem with gay men. I know several of them.”

Zac giggled. “That you do.”

“Well, not everyone is as tolerate and I only hope that Christopher and Aaron are as open minded as you.”

“Well, I don’t think you have to worry about that. I mean, Christopher is dating my best friend Craig and Aaron found himself a doctor, who saved my life when I was shot and again in Georgia. Ace, there both gay and have boyfriends that love them.”

“You were shot?”

Zac laughed and I looked at him. “Sorry! I mean he was worried about them understanding and out of all you said, being shot was the only thing I think he heard.”

“Yes, in January I was here with Aaron, Zac was in El Paso. Adam broke into the house and was trying to take me then but Aaron stopped him. Aaron had the gun and they were fighting over it, Aaron told me to hide but I was terrified and got hit twice on the right side. Aaron took me to his boyfriend; Zander and he did surgery and saved me. I’m fine.”

He looked over at Zac. “I heard the rest too, just that was more important.”

Zac smiled some. “His boyfriend saved his life too; I was fully prepared to beat his ass when I showed up. Promise me she’ll be safe and then let her get shot? But, I got here and couldn’t, he looked too miserable already.”

“You don’t strike me as the violent type really.”

Casey had come down about then and he just started laughing so we all looked at him.

“I’ve seen some of his tantrums, believe me he can be violent. I was actually rooting him on when he attacked David though. Trust me Ace; his violent side only comes out when someone hurts her. Every story I have heard has started with this jackass tried to hurt Emily.”

“Is that true?” Ace asked.

“Yeah. I broke Adam’s nose in Atlanta because he wouldn’t let her go and insisted she was coming with him. I whipped Paul’s ass in Texas because I walked into the room and he had his hand on her hip and he should have been in there, he was fine until he insinuated if I’d been later he’d have hurt her. I hit David because he slapped her and knocked her down, I don’t tolerate that at all….Adam, well, let’s say I beat his ass before he died.”

I wondered if he was going to tell him more but he didn’t, so I didn’t say anything.

“I revise my earlier statement; I may like him after all.”

I giggled. “What about siblings? Do you have any?”

“I have an older sister, Delilah Jane. She has a son and a daughter, Brionna Leann and Trevor Jacobs. Brie is sixteen now and Trevor is almost 17.”

“Does she know about us?”

“Yes. I told her because I would have needed witnesses to my character. Um, I would have loved for you to meet our parents but they passed away when you were two, a very bad car accident.”

“I’m sorry about that.”

“It wasn’t their fault really, drunk driver t-boned them.”

“So, do you have a steady boyfriend or husband?”

“I do actually; he said I should come alone first. Oddly, we live in Oklahoma City anyway, so it wasn’t that far. I moved out here to be with him about eight years ago. His name is Nathaniel James, and he changed his last name to mine.”

“That was nice of him.”

“We’ve been together ten years now, so it was ok with us both.”

“So, did your eventual job beat David’s?”

He smiled. “Yes, it did. I became an airline pilot, I work for Delta now and I’ve been with them for twenty years. I worked for a smaller airliner before that. It was what I wanted to do. Nathaniel loves it because we get to travel a lot. He’s an accountant with a firm in the city.”

“Nice, it’s possible we’ve flown with you before actually.”

“Anything is possible.”

“Is there anything you want to know? I don’t really know how much Jeremy told you.”

“He said you liked to draw a lot, read, didn’t say if you were a big writer of anything, he said you were close with your brothers and that they were very protective as well. He said you liked music quite a bit and given your choice of husband I don’t guess he was wrong about your obsession with the band Hanson.”

Zac giggled and I shot him a look. “No, I was more obsessed with just one member of Hanson but I doodled, I never really drew and you can ask Zac I suck at drawing. I do read a lot and my brothers are over protective much like my husband is. Music wise, yes I love music a lot.”

“I see, but there’s a picture of you over there sitting behind a drum set, looks like a professional set up.”

“Yeah, um that was the first tour I went on, I was their merchandise manager because they liked what I did in the warehouse. Touring is boring and Zac and I were together but no one knew so it was an easy way for him to be close to me without it being weird. He taught me how to play and that was the first picture he took, so it is a professional set-up, Zac’s.”

Zac smiled at me and I’m sure what memories he recalled weren’t totally innocent ones.

“That’s great actually, do you play anything else?”

“I do, the piano and Isaac god help him he’s tried to teach me to play the guitar but my fingers just don’t cooperate.”

“It’s not your fingers honey; you just don’t like the guitar.” Zac said.

“That is true, but I did try.”

They both smiled and he shifted a bit. “It’s weird seeing you now knowing I can’t change anything that happened in your life and I wish it was different.”

“I don’t.” I replied.

“Why not? He hurt you.”

“But, would I have made the same choices had I been with you? Probably not. I left home at 16 and moved in with friends who showed me more and didn’t hold back. When I said I was coming to Oklahoma they approved of that and came with me, when I decided to move here they didn’t stop me. I came here because there was nothing in Georgia that was holding me back. I was mad at my brothers for agreeing with our father then, I wasn’t talking to them. Had I never visited I never would have seen Zac in 2003 at that meet and greet, wouldn’t have talked to Isaac about business, he inspired me to work in business. I wouldn’t have returned in 2006 or applied at 3CG records. So, I wouldn’t be sitting here right now. My choices were because of what David did. It doesn’t mean I ever want to see him again. It doesn’t mean that I don’t want to know you. It just means I wouldn’t change my past because I am happy where I am.”

He smiled. “That is true; I can’t say that I would have been pleased with you running off to Oklahoma then.”

“Exactly. I wouldn’t change the choices I made.”

He smiled and stayed another hour talking about the places he’d been, people he’d met along the way. He talked more about him and Nathaniel and how they met. In return I told him more about Aaron and Christopher and because he did want to meet them as well, I told him I would let them know about the test and about him, I was sure they would be upset with me but perhaps they would understand. I wasn’t looking forward to that conversation. After he left I walked behind the chair Zac was still sitting in and leaned down.

“You didn’t have to stay.”

“I didn’t know him and I wasn’t going to let him hurt you in anyway.”

I put my arms around him and kissed his cheek. “I know. Where did Casey go?”

“He’s in our bedroom actually, something about putting together whatever he bought at the store. I’m kind of afraid that he has to put this together.”

I moved down to his neck and nipped him lightly. “You may like it.”

He shifted slightly and giggled when I hit a sensitive spot. “I hope so; I’m kind of not all that keen on being immobilized in any fashion right now though.”

I moved his hair and found a new spot to nibble on. “I said the same thing but he had a point there too. You trust both of us and you know this is play and not real. You know that once playtime is over, you’ll be released. We can’t be afraid of everything they did Zac, we like too much kinky stuff for that.”

He smiled and moments later I was sitting in his lap. “Love the face you make when I do that and I guess you’re right.”

“Um, wow, been a while since I’ve been flipped like that!”

He kissed me several times. “I’m tired though so can you go see if he’s done yet?”

“He’s right there.”

Zac turned to the steps where Casey stood giggling now. “I am done actually.”

“Good.”

“Did your visit go well?”

“Yes. You didn’t have to hide though.”

“Well, I had to assemble our little gift anyway. But, really you needed the time alone with him so you could talk and ask questions. I felt like he may not have opened up as much if I was here in the room.”

I got up and we followed him up-stairs, I wasn’t sure how Zac would take this surprise and I saw the confused and slightly afraid face he made when he saw it. Casey had gone with something that would put him on his hands and knees with a padded table under the chest and abdomen and the feet and ankles would be cuffed down and there was an optional attachment that would go around his neck, which Casey had on there. The reason he bought it though was the attached machine capable of going for full pumping actions for hours upon hours.

Yet, Zac didn’t seem too thrilled with it, so I spoke up. “The neckpiece is optional, not required.”

“Yeah, um not sure that part really is something I’d want to do right now.”

“I primarily got it for the other end, we can cuff you up, let the machine do all the work while we watch.” Casey said. His smile was ear to ear.

Zac giggled. “Ok. You two can explore this all you want, I am going to bed.”

“Well, we can explore later. I know she’s tired too and she wore my ass out today.”

We smiled and all of us got ready for bed and eventually went to bed. I laid awake a little while before Zac snuggled up to me and that was pretty much all it took to knock me out.