Desire ch. 50 - Denial is a Sweet Thing

[itztigress3]

Chapter 50 - Denial is a sweet thing
POV: Emily
Word Count: 4323

The words she said didn’t register for a minute and then it finally sunk in; she said there was a video of us having sex online for the world to see. I know by the looks I was getting that my face had paled.

“There’s a what?” I asked.

“It’s a video, it was posted about two hours ago, it originated on tumbler I believe but I can’t be sure. I was checking like Instagram because Taylor posted a picture of a messy ass desk and then I was just looking around and saw it. It says that it’s you and Zac.”

“Emily?” Zac asked.

Realizing that only Zac needed to know this for the moment I told her to e-mail me a link and hung up.

“Uh, Zac you and I need to go check a website.”

“Why?”

“Just come with me.”

He followed me to the studio where his laptop was sitting, she’d sent me the link and I followed it. It wasn’t just any video, it was the one I’d recorded with my phone back in December.

“Is that…No…” Zac said.

“Fuck!” I said.

He scared me when he went down to the floor, putting his head between his knees and breathing deeply. I watched him a moment before I looked at the comments, the plus was most didn’t believe that it was us. I actually saw a guy comment that my hips weren’t that wide. It was an odd comment, but then again, I had been seen during the last tour. The lack of people believing it was a plus, but reality was it truly was Zac and I, just not in a normal sexual position.

Casey knocked on the door. “Are you guys ok?”

“Yeah.” I said.

He came in to the room, looked at Zac rocking in the floor trying to steady his breathing. Then he looked at me and then the screen and his face just registered shock.

“Is that…like online?”

I nodded and he walked back to the door, hollered out that we were fine and we’d be back in a moment. Zac and I both looked at him completely stunned and confused.

Nothing was fine!

He walked over and looked at the screen, replayed the video.

“It was a hot video, but think about this…can anyone prove that it’s the two of you?”

“Sure Casey, they can prove that it’s my ass bent over a desk with some other man. Comforting.” Zac snorted.

“My point exactly. The video claims that it’s you and Emily, well last time I saw her hips weren’t that wide and you cannot tell based on sound because you’re not making any real sounds beyond a few grunts, and don’t we all sound the same during sex?”

“What are you suggesting?”

He kneeled down to Zac and patted his knee. “I’m saying that no one can prove that it is you two, no one can verify it because you have no way to tell. Believe me, Craig and I tried. He was afraid Adam would post it, evidently he did.”

“Yeah, but if he has the music room there’s no way for us to deny that. It wouldn’t be like that.” Zac said.

“Well, it was the two of you without strap ons right?”

“Yes.” I replied.

“That’s just normal sex Zac, nothing to fear.”

I giggled. “I think where his fear comes in there is how many fans would comment on that? You know his aversion to sex. It’s a graphic sexual video that shows him completely nude, do you know how many fans would just die to ask?”

“Well, he’d have to just get over that.”

“So…what are you proposing?” Zac asked.

“Respond to the video, post an official statement on the website acknowledging it and then just say it’s not the two of you. Hell, point out that’s its two men, because obviously the world knows Emmy here is female.”

“They do? I did see a comment about my hips not being that wide.” I asked.

He looked up. “Pictures of you from the retreat surfaced, wearing a bikini. It’s obvious you don’t have a dick Emmy.”

“Well, not unless I strap it on.”

Zac just fell back onto the floor. “I really really want to just punch the bastard.”

I heard a shriek from the room and it was Taylor’s. “Shit! I think Taylor just got an update.”

A few moments later he was screaming our names and we faced the music, there was no point in hiding he would come and find us!

“What the hell is this?” He asked

“It’s why I pulled him aside Taylor, Christina saw it. It’s not us.” I said.

“Are you positive?”

“Tay, dude it’s two men.” Casey said.

“WHAT?!?” He screeched.

Casey played the video on the laptop and you could kind of tell. Zac was completely pale as Taylor, Casey, and Isaac watched the video more than once. Even I was afraid that one of his brothers would recognize him; they had seen him nude before. I watched Zac carefully, he looked a little pale and I was afraid he would faint, if he did, they wouldn’t believe it wasn’t us. Thankfully, he didn’t.

“What a dumbass, he posted a gay porn video and said it was the two of you?” Isaac asked.

“Yep.” We said.

“Casey said we should make an official post and let people know it’s not us.” I said.

“No. What you need is something more powerful and personal; you need to do a video.” Taylor said.

Before either I or Zac could disagree he was gone and when he returned he had his video camera. I wasn’t sure that Zac could handle doing a video.

“We’ll just do a video blog. You can deny the video and show him whose boss as I am sure Adam did this?”

“Yeah, I would image it was him.” I said.

I looked at Zac. “I’m tired Taylor a blog would be quicker and far easier than doing a video.”

“Sure, but the impact won’t be as good.”

Zac alone in a video might convince the fan base and surely it would help that he tells them personally, but it would do nothing to Adam. But, if I could somehow piss him off even more then he could come sooner and we could get this shit over with.

Zac was about to argue over the point and I stopped him.

“Let me speak to him alone a minute.” I said.

I lead him to the far corner, away from the others and as soon as I faced him he shook his head.

“I’m not doing a video when a post is fine.”

“Baby, I think Tay’s right and for a few reasons. One is that your fan base is very loyal and the comments I saw don’t believe that it is us. Hearing it from your mouth will seal that more effectively than just words on a screen. You know that’s true.”

“I know that but a blog would be quicker.”

“I know it’s quicker, but what if seeing me in the video with you, in your lap, would be more of a message to Adam as well. Maybe it will bring him to us faster and he can be arrested and be out of our lives.”

“Wait; let me get this right you want to do the video with you in it, sitting in my lap just to piss him off? Emily the purpose of the video is not to piss Adam off.”

“I’m in that video too Zac. The fans see Taylor and Isaac with their wives, they never see us.”

“Because I don’t need them too Emily, a blog posting stating that it is not us if sufficient enough.”

“It is sufficient enough for some, but you know that it’s not that good of a message.”

“Sure Emily, if he does have a video from the music room, then doing the video could provoke him to actually post that video, there will not be a blog or a post that could excuse that.”

I got his hands and pulled him close to me, saw Casey and Taylor smile from behind him. The knowing I am winning smiles.

“Baby, if he had that kind of proof, he wouldn’t have used the video from the phone. If he was going for humiliation then posting something that clearly showed our faces would be better, even if it’s just pictures. It doesn’t matter what we say, fans are going to ask. I know you don’t want anyone to see that part of our life but Casey, but you have nothing to be ashamed of and we have nothing to feel ashamed of.”

“I just don’t want everyone asking me about it or knowing those kinds of details about our lives.”

I smiled at him. “If he had video of us having sex there, he would have posted that video and not the one he did. Aside from aggravating Adam, the video would be better because then fans can see our faces and it is not just words on a screen.”

He held my hands and I could tell he was thinking about the pros and cons and after a few minutes he finally sighed and said ok.

“Do we need to change or anything?”

“No. I just need a comb or something.”

“Your hairs fine, trust me.”

We turned and walked back to Taylor and told him we’d agree to do a video. He picked the chair and set up the camera while Isaac prepared the website to be updated, he even got a capture from the video to include. Casey sat to the side and watched, smiling. Once Zac was comfortable Taylor moved me and without even asking put me in his lap. My shot side was to Zac and out of habit his left hand came around my back, resting just above my hip and his right hand landed mid-thigh. Casey smiled but Taylor didn’t catch the implications. It was Taylor that told us when to start. I was a little nervous as Taylor counted down and then rolled the camera up to focus on us.

“Hello Everyone, Zac here and this is Emily Daniels, my fiancée. This is a Hanson.net public video. About an hour ago Emily and I received a call from a family member about a specific video that was posted online.  This video is very inappropriate and Emily and I would like to address the fan base personally concerning the video.”

“While the video certainly is nice it is not Zac and I. The video clearly is of a couple and it is also clear that the video is of two men, while we certainly have no problem with that we wanted to address this personally.” I said.

“Emily and I will make a formal request that the video be taken down, however we know that it was posted for several hours before we became aware of it. Because of that, we would like to apologize to the fans; we are sorry and we hope that no one was offended by the video. This video is not us and we do not have any type of…” he trailed off and his face was blushing.

“We don’t have home videos and we never have. Again, we apologize if the video offended anyone. But Zac and I are officially and formally stating this is not us. We are deeply offended by the person who felt like doing this and we apologize to the individuals in the video, we hope there not offended either.”

“My brother’s and I would like to thank you for your continued support, encouragement, and undying loyalty to the band and our music. We will do another stream soon to announce details of the album, tour, and other Hanson news.” Zac said.

We both smiled, him giving his trademark warm smile and Taylor recorded a few extra seconds so they could fade the video.

“I hate including this capture.” Ike said.

“It’s pretty hot if you ask me.” Casey said.

“It is, but it’s just not something I want to see.” Taylor said.

“Understandable, it’s not for everyone and I think the video will help fans move past this. You should probably expect questions on this for the upcoming tour though.” Casey said.

“Ugh.” Zac groaned.

Taylor sat down and it took them about fifteen minutes to edit the video by fading it in and out, adding the Hanson copy write information after and then to actually post with a short message on why. Then they made an official complaint on the post for tumblr, which Taylor assured us they should remove it. The account it was originally posted under was brand new.

“Ok, it’s late and I am starving.” Ike said.

Everyone agreed, after the video was posted we all left to go home. I called Christina back to say we had responded on the website and that it wasn’t us. She said the person over the desk couldn’t have been me and not Zac either; apparently his ass would look far better than that. I smiled knowing that it was indeed Zac. When we got home Zac went to change clothes and Casey and I made a quick dinner. We then sat down at the table to eat.

“So...Amanda mentioned a good topic.” I said.

They both glanced at me. “Which was?” Casey asked.

“She asked if we were doing bachelor and bachelorette parties.”

Zac looked at me and raised an eyebrow. “What did you tell her?”

“That I didn’t know. I’m not sure about the safety of one and I’m not sure what to really say to it. I figured I’d ask if you were doing one.”

“I think you both should, just because it’s kind of tradition. Although, I am like you I’m not sure if they would be safe.”

“There’s no question to safety, the answer is no. Because Adam would surely watch and as soon as everyone around you is falling down drunk off their ass, he’ll swoop in. Since no one else will be there, nothing would be stopping him.”

“Well, not entirely. She doesn’t have to do the party at a bar. It’s not even something that’s required but I mean, I think if you did it the same night then you could do the parties at your brother’s house if they’re ok with it. I mean, Emily can go to one and you the other. There alarm systems are top notch Zac and Isaac’s even in a gated community right?”

“Yeah, he is.”

“Send Emily there, there is a guard on duty at the gate and the alarm is there. She won’t be alone Zac, she’ll have her friends and your sisters there. Likewise, you won’t be alone either because you’ll have friends and family.”

“He has a point, I mean the only thing I can’t do is strippers because really, one could be Adam.”

Zac giggled. “I can always dress up as a Martian and crash the party.”

“Sure Zac, you’re going to come give me a lap dance in your thong with your sisters in the room? Your sister in laws? My friends? If you think a Martian hat would hide who you are, you are sadly mistaken.”

“It was a thought.”

“I could crash your, be one of the strippers.”

“What would you be? Bullet girl? If you think I’d be found out, I am sure I’d know it’s you.” He said.

I rolled my eyes. “Actually, I know I don’t have to worry about you. As soon as she walks in front of you and starts stripping, you’d probably hide under the nearest blanket or behind the nearest person.”

Casey laughed. “You’re probably right.”

“I am not that bad.”

I smiled. “But you’d be ok if we did them?”

He finished his potatoes and had another few swallows of tea. “If Isaac agrees to let you use his house and at least two people stay 100% sober, I don’t mind. No bars, no public places.”

“Otherwise, he won’t enjoy his.” Casey said.

I nodded and sent Amanda a quick text message about it and told her I would ask Nikki about it first also, her being pregnant ensured she’d be sober. We went to bed kind of late, but it was ok.

February 23, 2010: Tuesday

I considered throwing the alarm, but got up instead. We were at the office by 7:45, Taylor and Isaac didn’t drag themselves in until almost 9. By then I was about ready to add the new invoices, Zac had helped cost them and Casey had verified the totals for us. He was staying with me to ensure that all the rest of the information was valid. Stephanie the other members arrived at 8:30. At 10 I was standing at receiving the first of three trucks. They sounded bad, but two only had a few items but the quantities were larger. I verified as they came in to save time because I couldn’t lift any of them. I could hear the member’s EP churning away. Most of the songs had been written during Fool’s before they were rudely called home. When the trucks were all here I relocked and secured the door and then took the invoices up to the office, Casey went to the studio. We actually got to leave at 5 which was awesome as Aaron and Zander were sitting on our porch when we got home.

“I don’t recall you being released for work duty.” Aaron said.

I smiled. “I’m just bossing people around and sitting at my desk. Beside, Ike was right 3CG went to hell when I left. I had to drop another atomic size temper tantrum to whip them all into shape.”

He smiled. “I’m kidding.”

Zander just stood there quietly and I watched him a moment, he was nervous and a little unsure. He was glancing at Zac nervously as if he was sure Zac was going to hate him or something. I nudged Zac a bit and looked at him. He smiled some and walked over to Zander.

“So, Zander, you mentioned this fan girl moment after she was fine.”

“Yeah…”

“I have tried to get him over here for days; I finally lied and told him we were going for dinner.” Aaron said.

I giggled some and unlocked the door, let them inside. Zac let Zander in first and he closed the door after he came inside.

Zander stood there, looking stunned as if he never expected himself to be in the house, never expected to meet him or anything.

“Want me to fix dinner for everyone?” I asked.

“Hell no! We can just freshen up and go get something if they’re ok with it?” Zac said.

“We’re fine; he’ll talk when he stops freaking out.”

“Well, unfortunately I need to shower before we go anywhere. I’ve been playing most of the day, so if you guys don’t mind I’ll hop in and out quickly and won’t smell then.” Zac said.

“Please, shower!” Casey said.

Zac gave him a snarky look. “I’ll be back.”

He passed Zander and went up-stairs. Casey went up-stairs too to change shirts and he was back in no time.

“So, Zander you’re a fan too?” Casey asked.

“Yes. I have been for a few years now. I cannot believe I am standing in Zac Hanson’s house though.”

“I know that feeling well. He’s really cool though.” Casey said.

I looked at Aaron and smiled. “Zander, would you like to see the music room?”

“There is a music room here?”

“Yes.” I said.

I got his hand and lead him to from the foyer to the music room. He stood at the door and just looked around, amazed at the pictures and the drums and different instruments.

“Obviously it’s not the studio, but it’s where they play a lot too. You can sit down if you want too, Zac will not mind.”

“Are you for real? I can sit down at his drum set?”

“Yes. Just don’t play anything, its set up to record and I don’t want to get him mad.”

He carefully sat down at the drums and just kind of ran his fingers around the rim of the drums, never touching the set of drumsticks sitting there. He looked around the room at some of the pictures hanging on the walls; some were rare and not seen by fans. Aaron and I both took a picture of him sitting there and he just took in the room.

“Is that them?”

“Yes. I think Zac said he was one in that picture. It’s his favorite one of them when he was that little. Taylor and Isaac keep the same picture as well, along with the first one as a band. But that one is at 3CG in the studio.”

Aaron leaned against the doorframe. “I tried to tell you I knew them, but you didn’t believe me.”

He just gave him what I assumed was his version of the bitch face, which was quite similar to Taylor’s.

“Least you have your picture with them all.” Zander said.

“You can too, I’m sure Tay and Ike won’t mind. Well, even if they do I’ll just threaten another atomic explosion and they’ll bend.”

“I’m not sure I want to see what you define an atomic explosion.” He replied.

“You don’t!” Casey called.

We moved to the living room to wait for Zac. He must have forgotten that Zander’s choice of brother’s was him, as he came down stairs in a button up shirt with a t-shirt, and just boxers.

Aaron and Zander both moved pillows and I wasn’t quite sure how I felt about that yet, Casey shamelessly watched him walk all the way down to the rear of the house.

“Babe, what are you looking for?”

“The black pants you bought me last week.”

“There hanging in the closet, far end on your side with the other black pants.”

“Oh, I looked in the drawer.”  Again, he went back through this time up-stairs and Casey moved to the living room and sat down himself.

I would give anything to be a fly on the wall at his bachelor party that was bound to be interesting, especially with Zac’s apparent talent of being very sexual without really meaning too. He came back down a few minutes later and we left to get dinner, he drove so Aaron and Zander followed us.

“Zac, do you realize you probably turned them both way on?” Casey asked.

“Casey! I didn’t need that image he’s my brother!” I said.

“Huh?” Zac asked.

“There both gay, Aaron’s already confessed that Zander has admired your rear end a few times. Yet, you come bouncing downstairs in just boxers? I saw the results, it wasn’t pretty.”

I saw the blush creep into his face. “I...I didn’t even think about that.”

“Well, for crying out loud don’t order an ice cream cone!” Casey said.

“Fuck Casey, now he will just to torture you.”

He parked and looked at us. “I’m not ordering an ice cream cone.”

“Good.” We said.

“I’ll order a popsicle instead.” He then got out and both of us groaned and got out.

Dinner went pleasant, after Zander got a little more comfortable they had a pretty decent conversation about music and different elements, it was right in Zac and Casey’s comfort zones. But that left me and Aaron to talk on our own.

“Have you decided what you were doing about being walked? You mentioned not knowing what to do.”

“Not a clue.”

“Ask George Emily.”

“What if he doesn’t want too?”

He smiled. “He wants too. He was upset when you told Dad not to come at all, but then he worried you wouldn’t get the wedding you always wanted. He doesn’t want you to walk alone.”

“It wouldn’t be weird?”

“No. I mean it would be weird for all five of us to give you away, but even though he’s the oldest he’s always been the most protective over you. You won’t remember it but George basically took care of you for the first six months. Dad was in no shape to care for a baby and even though George was clueless, Aunt Sheila came over a few days and he watched her, basically she taught George. When he was home, you were always near him.”

“He never told me that.”

He smiled. “He was hoping you’d forgive Dad, but then when they confirmed it and then when he told him that he did things Adam wanted, he pretty much gave up.”

I smiled at him. “You sure he won’t say no?”

“I’m positive.”

We finished our dinners and visited a bit before heading home, it was going to be a busy few weeks and we still had to finalize a few plans for the wedding and we had to go in a week and finish paying for everything.

Having Casey in the house was actually nice because he was such a huge help. He made Zac and I feel more comfortable being there, he was a great cook for the nights the boys worked into the late hours and I couldn’t get up. He was also a huge help during those first few weeks, he took care of me for a few days so they could get things done without worrying about me. Even in the studio he was a huge help. While he certainly joked and made comments in a sexual way, he’d not asked or made any advances.

As we lay down I considered Aaron’s words, I had planned not to have anyone walk me down the aisle, and I was just going to walk alone. But, if Aaron was right then perhaps asking George wouldn’t be weird.