Infinity Chapter 30 - Parties Galore

[itztigress3]

Chapter 30 – Parties Galore
POV:  Emily
Word count: 4176


September 22, 2013; Arizona

  It had been a busy few weeks, after Richmond there was several days which we spent with family and thankfully they were ok with us not wanting to be up at dawn and on the go all day. We learned that Nadine and Joshua were expecting again and this time they were expecting twins! It was definitely good news and it was so exciting to know soon I’ll have three more nephew or nieces to add to the list.

Yet, after that brief break it was non-stop, we literally had a show every night for ten days straight. While, it didn’t seem that bad to me because Velma was dealing with most everything it was taxing on Zac because the last several days Alexander had wanted Zac at night, waking up at 2 or 3 am every night, sometimes it was just a diaper change and as long as he was with Zac he was fine, other nights he wanted milk and there was one night he didn’t go back to sleep at all, Zac ended up waking me up at 4:30 because he was afraid he was going to fall asleep. I wasn’t in the room ten minutes before Zac passed out on the sofa. I actually refused to let them wake him up, because the days of going to bed at 3 or 4 and then getting up at 8 was just wearing him out. He even missed the walk that day.

We attended Riley’s party yesterday, she had a great birthday party for her 1^st, and it was great to spend time with Maddi too. We talked quite a bit anyway, but it wasn’t the same as being there and actually seeing her. Riley’s party was the afternoon, perfect since we didn’t get in until 5 in the morning and Max was kind enough to watch Alexander while we slept a bit, although I’d slept more than Zac so I let him sleep basically until I had to get him up.

Present wise we kept things low key, despite Zac’s desire to buy the child a whole new bedroom suit I had reeled him back to what Maddi had told me, clothes or toys. But, Zac did work on something special, it had taken him all month to complete it a little at a time, but Max had sent him a picture of Maddi and Riley asleep on the sofa, taken late August. Max asked if he could draw it and Zac agreed to do it on the condition that it was from them both. Maddi was against the back of the sofa, Riley was laying in front of her, it was a great picture. Maddi was surely shocked at that gift.

Today however we were attending another party, this time for Velma. We’d flown out early this morning and was in Tuscan early, Isaac picked us up from the airport.

“Damn Zac you look like a zombie.”

“I feel like one.”

“Which is why he’s sleeping when we get back, what time did Taylor set her party for?”

“Given we have a show tomorrow he went with 4 to 6, others can stay obviously but we do have the show tomorrow and my advice for Zac would be sleep.”

“Assuming Alexander lets me?” Zac asked.

“He will, you can crash when we get to the hotel.”

“About that….” Ike said.

“Don’t tell me they fucked up.”

“Velma didn’t know you were coming in today, she thought it was tomorrow. The only peeps with extra beds are Casey and Robert, Casey said he would take the roll out and give you guys the bed.”

“But there in the room?” Zac asked.

“Yeah.”

“It’ll be fine, I’ll crack my whip and they’ll be quiet.”

Zac just glared at me but he was sleeping whether he wanted to or not. We got there and got a key and headed up to the room. Alexander was being incredibly whiney though, so I was hoping with Robert and Casey there he’d give Zac a break. I unlocked the door and pushed it opened, walked in and I just stopped at the sight before me. I heard Zac gasp some and Alexander laughed, giving us away. The deer in headlights look from both Casey and Robert was to die for. I really should have taken a picture, I would have had they not been naked in the bed, Robert looked mortified as he was apparently the bottom in this round.

“We can step outside if you’d like?” Zac asked.

Given the mortified looks, I doubted us stepping outside would do anything, but we did walk back to the door giving them some privacy to untangle themselves and cover up a bit. Robert bolted from the room as soon as he was dressed, mumbling something about coffee.

Casey only put his boxers on and was sitting on the edge of the bed looking completely stunned and afraid, even though he had no reason to be afraid.

“I thought your flight was at 11.”

“Originally it was, but we got an earlier flight because Ike wanted to visit some place here before Velma’s party to get her something, we changed to an early flight. We got in at 7.”

Zac giggled. “Least it was his name you were calling and not mine.”

He sat Alexander down and he headed right for the toys that Casey had apparently brought inside. We sat down on the bed that was still made up, indicating that no one had even slept in it.

“Shouldn’t you be going after Robert?” I asked.

“He’s coming back actually; he went for coffee for us both. Neither of you look pissed off…”

“Why should we be mad? Casey we always knew that…” I stopped him.

I then moved over beside him and nudged him. “We’re not mad, but answer honestly; you’re not just with him because he resembles Zac?”

He was quiet. “Casey.” Zac said.

He sighed heavily and Zac moved over to the other side. “Let it out Casey, we won’t be mad at you.”

He looked between us. “I know you frown upon crew members dating or being together in any way, right now we’re not serious.”

“Then what are you?” I asked.

“Honestly? Nothing until today! We’ve talked a lot on the bus and during the show because we work side by side. There was a kiss a few weeks back but neither of us really did much about it.”

“How come the other bed isn’t messed up then?”

“Friday night it was the bus and we just played games, last night we were sitting here watching a movie and fell asleep, I woke up around 3 and turned the TV off. I can’t deny he does resemble Zac and his personality is a bit more laid back though, he’s not quite as insane. We do have a lot in common.”

“Did you tell him about us?” I asked.

“No, as far as he knows we are very good friends and I am Alexander’s god father, he doesn’t even know his middle name is mine, he doesn’t know my middle name.”

“You must have woken up horny as hell then.” Zac said.

“Actually, that was both of us, it’s been a while dude.”

“Zac’s going to shower and sleep, after that I can take Alexander to the hall if you want to finish.”

“I don’t think Robert would go for that.”

“Sorry we interrupted.”

“Maybe that’s better because we probably need to talk first.”

“I’d say you were talking pretty well.” Zac said.

He looked kind of down though and the way he kept looking at Zac, I was pretty sure I understood why.

“Zac why don’t you go ahead and shower right quick.”

He patted Casey’s back a few times and then got his bag and went to the bathroom; Alexander followed him to the door and then stopped and looked at me with this heart breaking look before he started crying, the door opened and Zac picked him up.

“I’ll shower with him, have his clothes ready.”

He then closed the door and I looked at Casey. “We know you love us Casey, we know your content with what’s been happening between us all. But, you deserve someone who can give themselves to you completely and you have known all along that neither of us can do that.”

“I have known that but I’m just…” tears were gathering in his eyes.

“Would you rather do this alone without any risk of them coming in?”

“I would, yes.”

“Ok. When Zac’s asleep then we’ll take a walk, Alexander could use some fresh air and maybe Zac can sleep then.”

“Yeah, he’s acting weird.”

“He is.”

Robert came back right before and paused by the bathroom door, before realizing that Zac wasn’t in the room. He handed Casey his coffee and shyly looked at me.

“I’m not mad.”

“Thankfully.”

Alexander came running out naked as a jay bird, Zac followed in a towel and both Casey and Robert looked very uncomfortable, Casey shifted as did Robert.

“Sorry, I couldn’t get him to stand still to get the towel around him, I was afraid he would slip. I almost did.”

He handed me the towel and I wrapped him up, Zac casually strolled back to the bathroom and I was sure Casey’s eyes were on his ass, Robert was even glancing.

“Oh for god’s sake you two stop!” I said.

Both looked at me and Casey grinned some. I picked Alexander up and got him dressed, Zac came out dressed and still looking like a zombie, he’d gone with sleep pants and a t-shirt, and not what he would have chosen had it just been Casey.

“You know I doubt either would mind if it was just boxer’s honey, I know Casey wouldn’t.”

Roberts’s cheeks blushed some as well and Casey just looked at me. Zac glanced at me before he fell across the bed. “I’m fine.”

I showered after him; Alexander was fine to stay in the room with Daddy. So I got a shower that allowed me all the time in the world. I got dressed in the bathroom and then stepped out. Robert was laying on the bed asleep and Alexander was sitting on the bed beside Zac who was passed out as well.

“Guess we can head out and chat if you want.”

“If you can pry Alexander from Zac, he’s been sitting right here. I am sure Zac knows he’s there.”

“He does. He’ll come with me he just prefers to be there.”

He had nursed on the plane and was fine for a few more hours so we got his diaper bag and when Casey held his hands out he came right to him. We left them asleep in the room and went by the bus first to get his stroller and Casey strapped him in good. We picked a random route and started walking.

“So, we’re away from Zac and Robert. Spill it.”

He was pushing the stroller because I knew Zac would prefer it be some guy and I was walking beside him.

“You know Max and I dated, right?”

“Yes Casey, I know about Max and Fernando, some girl.”

“I never told Zac about my last relationship, I mean he was going through so much with Kate and recording and I didn’t want to burden him with worrying about me. So, I broke up with Max in 2005, it was mutual and I was busy recording an album and playing all the time, he studied it was just better. After him and Fernando I dated a woman briefly, but didn’t feel anything and honestly I don’t even remember her name.”

“So bad Casey.”

“I know I was never into women really. Obviously I know what to do; it’s just sexually I was always more into men. Anyway, I took time after Max. I was still very much obsessed with Zac, he was like a rock and anytime I could see him I did.”

“I understand that and honestly I know you were in love with him when I called. It’s why I didn’t make you. I wasn’t sure if you could walk away, I guess you couldn’t.”

“Not my fault!”

“I know, so you took a break and you just fantasized about Zac, I won’t tell him that.”

“He’d probably flip out if he knew the extent of my obsession. Anyway, in November of 2006 I met a guy in a bar, Jimmy Edwards. He was no Zac. Tall, lean, blonde hair and the brightest blue eyes I’d ever seen, even surpassing Taylor’s. He was the all American beach bum guy. He surfed a lot, worked hard, did construction because he loved working with his hands. We hooked up obviously but I went back in December and we talked. He loved music, had heard of the band and everything that went with it. Said he loved every song I did, we started officially dating in January, the 4^th of 2007.”

“How come you never mentioned him to us?”

“He was private; he wasn’t ready for everyone to know. Emily, he was the only man that ever made me forget about Zac. Like the retreat in 2007 I couldn’t wait to go home to him. If I had to compare the way I felt about him I’d say it’s exactly how you feel about Zac.”

I stopped walking and looked at him. “You loved him that much?”

“Yes. I moved in with him in June of that year and I felt truly happy.”

He started walking and I fell into his steps easily, but I was sensing that something had occurred in that time.

“Everything was fine until September, I got back from a short one month tour and he accused me of fucking everyone on the bus, actually called them to ask including Jake and Gary. He was loud and angry, I didn’t understand. As the month passed he got worse and by the end of the year we were arguing pretty much all the time, he was accusing me of cheating on him, he got verbally abusive telling me how much my music sucked, how he never liked it, he put Hanson down a lot because he knew Zac was a great friend of mine.”

We turned a corner and he spotted a park down the road, so we went toward the park. Alexander was quietly enjoying the stroll, but I knew his lunch time was approaching; he was quiet until we were seated in the park, and Alexander had some toys and was content now.

“I attended the fool’s banquet retreat in 2008 and I was pretty miserable and well Zac was too really because of what was going on with you. When I got home he was waiting and accused me of fucking Zac the whole time I was there, I pointed out that Zac was straight. We argued and then he hit me, hard right across the face. That started the more physically abusive side.”

I blinked; Casey had never said anything about that.

“It wasn’t like with women Ems, he didn’t like beat the living hell out of me daily or anything it just..was random. Sometimes playful but the longer it happened the worse it got, In October of that year he grabbed my arm and yanked me into the bathroom and after a couple of hours my wrist and arm wouldn’t stop hurting so I drove myself to the ER. I was afraid he’d broken it, but it was just sprained. The intern that treated me was Max; he saw the other bruises and asked me what was going on.”

That clearly explained their stronger bond to me. “What did he do?”

“He saw the ones on my side too and asked me about them, I said I fell and he told me if I lied again he’d get the biggest needle they had for my upcoming pain shot. I told him about Jimmy and he told me I wasn’t going back there, made me sit at the ER for three hours until his shift was over. He then took me home and once he was certain I was fine physically, not sex wise though, he had me shower, fed me and put me to bed. He’s younger but wiser Ems, he told me I needed to leave because it would only get worse, provided examples and told me that he didn’t want anything like that to happen. He didn’t quite know about Zac but he said that my friends wouldn’t either.”

“He was right, you seen how Adam was.”

“He went with me to move my stuff back to Jakes and to confront him, it wasn’t pretty. Max actually hit him when he got my arm. I did consider asking Max if he wanted to date, but he’d just gotten out of a relationship as well. We had a few hook ups after that, up until you called me on October.”

“Is that why you’ve been so content with this arrangement?”

“I didn’t want to tell either of you that I wasn’t looking for a relationship because it scared me. Did I love Fernando ? Not really, he was my first real boyfriend and everything was so new. Did I love Max? Yes but I didn’t want to hurt him because I still thought about Zac. With Jimmy it was different, when we were together sexually or otherwise, I never thought about Zac and when I was around Zac, it was easier to not think about what could be.”

Alexander threw the toy and Casey used that as a break from the conversation, but Alexander was getting restless so I got him and Casey followed me to the swings. I sat him down and gently swing him and god he was so happy there. Casey got some pictures of him.

“Casey, are you afraid to be in another committed relationship? Are you afraid of the same thing happening? Is that why you are so content and happy with what we have?”

“I would lie and so No and No and yes, but you’d just call me out. Yes to them all. I’m afraid of falling for someone like Jimmy and having those same feelings and then it ending horribly like it did. I know exactly where I stand with you and Zac, I know that his number one is you and yours is him. I’m just afraid to be number 1.”

“So, you and Robert are what?”

“Seriously Emily, that literally was the first time and damn you two have horrible fucking timing but maybe that’s better.”

I turned to him. “Casey, you deserve to be truly happy because while you are happy with us, you’re not truly happy. I understand it’s scary as hell to have such a relationship and then not want to be in the same boat. But sometimes it’s worth it.”

“If he’s like Jimmy?”

I smiled. “If he turns out like Jimmy, then I’ll send Zac after him. You know Zac will beat his ass.”

He started to say something and then stopped; instead he tickled Alexander when he came back to us.

“Casey…” I said.

His cheeks were getting slightly pink and his neck was pink as well. “I didn’t tell Robert why I woke up horny, just told it was a dream.”

“Was it?”

“Well, yes, it was. But I didn’t tell him what was going on which was a lovely three some with them.”

“You were dreaming about you with both of them?”

He nodded. “I am not ashamed to admit that, Robert kind of commented on Zac.”

I looked at him, confused a bit. “What do you mean?”

“I caught him staring the other day, Zac was down on his hands and knees plugging something up and I caught Robert staring at him. He told me he use to have some mild crush ages ago, but not anymore.”

It shouldn’t have bothered me at all, but given the thongs I’d found and the calls and things, it did. I didn’t respond to him and instead pushed Alexander again, who giggled loudly.

“Emily? What is it?”

“Nothing.”

“Don’t nothing me, what is it?”

“You caught Robert but have you caught Zac?”

I know he turned and looked right at me but I didn’t avert my attention at all, instead waited.

“Do you want to explain that question to me?”

“Nope. I’d like an answer though.”

“No, I haven’t caught Zac staring at anyone but you, because that’s who he loves. Now, explain why you asked.”

“Like you haven’t noticed Casey, the small arguments, late nights when he thinks those two and three am texts aren’t waking me up, the e-mails that I never see but are business related. I don’t know what’s going on but he seems more stressed and he practically made Carrick stay with me before we left because of the snow globe, which wasn’t a big deal. Yes, it freaked me out but really lots of people know I don’t like them.”

“He could be working on something for you Emily; you know how he is sometimes. He coordinates and surprised you with trips like Cancun.”

“This doesn’t feel like that Casey, he’s not talking to me about it. He all but blamed me for Alexander being hurt on that walk. It’s why I’ve not taken him anymore, I felt bad enough that I didn’t expect Zac to blame me too.”

“But you two talked about that.”

“It doesn’t matter Casey.”

He turned me roughly to face him. “Emily Isabella Hanson you better listen to me. Zachary loves you, I watched him fall apart when we couldn’t find you, watched him worry for nine months when you were so sick. He loves you and the only person he’ll even consider asking is me and even then, you know where you’ll be. He’s not cheating on you Emily; I don’t know where those thoughts are coming from.”

I blinked; he’d been so forceful with his statements and his words, that really he made sense.

“Ok.” It was all I could think of.

“Now, we should get back, it’s getting close to his feeding time and he’s looking tired.”

He got him out and carried him most of the way back to the hotel, I came by the bus and got him green beans and then we headed to the room. He got the green beans first, Casey held him as I fed and then he nursed well. He definitely ate well. Zac and Robert were still out, so after a clean diaper I laid him beside Zac and laid down myself for a bit. Resigned to believe Casey, after all he knew Zac as good as I did, maybe he was planning something special.

Velma was surprised by her party; she didn’t think we’d remember! She had a great party that afternoon with drinking and food and cake, which Alexander still didn’t much like. Despite the time Zac was knocking back a lot of drinks and I know Casey noticed as well. Velma loved everything she got and was happy. But, knowing there was a show the next day, after her party we kind of split. Robert and Casey had to help Zac back to the room. But both Robert and I were stunned absolutely silent when he just kissed Casey and thanked him, full on lip lock kiss. Casey looked stunned and confused.

“Well, I didn’t expect that.” Robert said.

“He’s a little more than drunk.” I replied.

“I can tell, he drank more tonight than anyone else.”

It made me wonder what he was drinking for, because usually the only time he drank heavily or at all was when something was truly bothering him. Casey shoved him onto the bed we would have, clearly confused and stunned because Zac normally didn’t do stupid stuff like that with others around.

Robert seemed ok and even asked Casey if he’d take a walk with him, I gave Casey a reassuring smile when he walked out. I fed Alexander about 6:30, Zac still looked pretty dazed. I had no idea what was going on with him, which made me feel even worse. I couldn’t get him to talk to me even when he was drunk about what was going on. By 8:30 he was passed out anyway, Alexander laid down at 9 with him and was out and I waited until Robert and Casey were back before I lay down as well. They both promised they wouldn’t wake us up, but it was Zac’s phone at 2:30 that woke me up and I clearly could tell Casey and Robert were in the bathroom, dear god what had I done?! Zac grunted but didn’t answer the phone; I reached over him and turned the volume off before it woke Alexander up and then I went back to bed.